Sex Drive – Getting down to the nasty !

Libidos differ in each of us and often we realize those differences after the relationship settles. While the sex that we had in the beginning when we first met was intense, wild and fun, it does not mean the best of our sex life with our partner is behind us.
There are ways of bringing out a more adventurous, romantic and satisfying sex life with your partner and making her feel more sexual.
Here are a few ways to bring out your partners desires:
Be unpredictable.
One of the biggest problems in sexual boredom with our partner is predictability. The mystery seems to be gone. Spice this up. If you do not use toys, surprise her with one, draw a candle lit bath for her, place a pair of hand cuffs on her pillow, blind fold her, use feathers, cough drops and ice. Wear lingerie or dress up in a cop uniform, wrestle or chase her, strip tease for her, read erotica to her in bed or surprise her with a naughty video. Be creative.
Diane, 29, from San Francisco says, "I liked it very much, when my lover came to bed with her strap on underneath her boxers. It was a sexy surprise when I made the discovery and I became instantly turned on!"
Develop yourself as an individual.
Keep her guessing and intrigued, not by pushing her away, but by establishing yourself outside the relationship. Having your own interests, hobbies and friends can bring new things to the relationship. When you function as a couple, with little interaction outside your relationship, there is little to talk and learn about from each other that you do not already know.
Keep yourself in shape and package your appearance.
More easily said than done, but there are things you can do to make yourself more appealing to your partner: A new outfit, hair cut, start working out, and for goodness sake, instead of going to bed in that stained old T-shirt go to bed in sexy boxers, lingerie or better yet, naked.
Lonnie, 35, from Southern CA, says, "My wife has a libido that is more active than mine, sometimes I am just too tired. But when she goes to bed naked and that beautiful body is pressing up against me, I find myself playing with her until it becomes a passionate night of love making."
Show her the person she became attracted to and fell in love with in the first place. Make her proud of the package on her arm. Do not dress in the same old jeans and flannel to her Christmas party or to her favorite restaurant.
Ask her how she would like to see you. Maybe she would like to see you in a suit and tie, a femme outfit, high heels or camouflage! Humor her.
Foreplay begins before you walk in the door.
DATE YOUR PARTNER! Turn off that computer and /or television. Spend quality time with your partner, talk to her, listen to her, give her kisses at unexpected times, talk about your fantasies together, give her massages, and surprise her with dinner.
Try a weekend away from the stress.
It is always nice to get away from the stresses and pressures that we have at home. To concentrate on sex while there are dishes in the sink, clothes in the dryer, children in the bathtub, work to be done… could put a damper on your sex life. Take her away from that to a nice hotel or set things up so that she does not feel like she is at home. Put those pictures of Grandma, Mom and Dad out of the away and out of the bedroom for the evening. Put a lock on the door so that the children are not able to come busting in. Have a Sade or Madonna love ballad CD playing.
Ask her about her desires.
What does she like in bed and what she would like you to do in bed. Some women can be uncomfortable about talking about these things, but be patient, tell her what you like, and want. She may want more time spent on oral sex, she may want to try a vibrator, or to be cuddled more, to masturbate for you or have you masturbate for her. Maybe she wants you to be more dominant or submissive. Start talking about sex!
Stop chasing.
If all else fails and you find that you are always the chaser, stop chasing. Some women enjoy doing the chasing. They simply cannot if you are always chasing them. Try to be less accessible and less interested and see how she responds. If it still does not work, go back to chasing.
One final note:
Get over the idea that since sex was so fabulous when you first got together that now something must be wrong just because it has become less exciting and less often. Quit stressing over the frequency of your lovemaking. It is perfectly normal to have sex as often as once a week as it is to have it every day! If your needs simply are not being met and you are not feeling the sexual closeness that you once had, then there may be cause for worrying.
By working on your relationship, your sex life should follow suit. If you are having problems in your relationship, your sex life will surely suffer. If there is a ridiculous lack of sex in your relationship, there may be something very wrong. You may try counseling and possibly even have your partner seek medical advice.

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